Trying to get out of a relationship - help

[Sharee1960]

I have been with someone for almost 2 years who is a psychopath. I met him after a very bad breakup with someone I loved dearly and I had just gone into full menopause - the timing was ideal, in fact, it was the perfect storm, I’ve tried walking away twice before but I keep being drawn back through hope that I was wrong, that he can be a better man, that he can care, that if I just try a little harder to be understanding. But in my heart I know it’s hopeless.

I have a large peice of cardboard leaning against a vase in front of me, and written on it in thick indelible ink is: He is a psychopath, he will not change; he is wholly incapable of being even a marginally decent human being. Do not text / do not call / do not forget the hurt / do not look back. Ever.

It’s not working. Help.... why is walking away so hard?

[onandup]

Hi - the problem is a 'relationship' with a psychopath/sociopath/narcissist can be, probably is addictive. It certainly was for me, and I kept going back until, I guess, I had enough 'evidence'. It's all [Information removed. Moderator] book Toxic No More. [Information removed. Moderator] how we get into these situations, why we stay (often we believe the lie that we're still in 'love' but is it love? How can it be? For me it was a physical addiction, with adrenalin and fear racing through my body. Once I left the relationship I got physical withdrawal but knew I had to keep on staying away. Eventually things got better, in a way, immediately they got better, the relief of being 'safe' - but what took time was separating myself, allowing the denial to fall away as I accepted it really WAS very very bad. I was in a dark place for a long time but life got better and better. I wish you well, and hope that helped. [Information removed. Moderator]

[Turtlegirl146]

They are definitely addicting. I'm addicted to his good looks and charm. He's the most affectionate person I've ever met. But when the psycho comes out it's sheer terror. It can be over the simplest thing and I have to find a way to escape. One day I may not make it to safety and I keep telling myself this so I will stay away